I was in my mid-twenties and if I’m being honest, I was feeling pretty desperate. Desperate for love. I kept wondering if I would meet anyone to get married to & start a family with. It seems that now, the age 35 is the new 25 for “prime time” to marry, but at that time a lot of my friends were dating & all I felt like I was doing was waiting. 

Growing up I always dreamed of a healthy marriage! My parent’s marriage didn’t make it, so I knew from a young age that marriage wouldn’t be easy. But I also knew that if I could get God in on it, my marriage could last.

But the question was: Who was the guy?!!

I remember crying out to God many nights asking for Him to speak to me and help this “guy” find me! Lol! I kept getting confused and thinking it was certain guys at church or work that seemed cool or nice but none of them were the kind of godly guy I was looking for.  Before I share about the man I did marry, (you’ll love the story!) I want to share a few key reasons why I wanted, specifically a godly man. 

3 Reasons I Wanted to Marry a Godly man

1. I wanted to marry a godly man because I knew that if he loved Jesus, more than he loved me, we could do anything, even stay married.

It’s hard to describe to my younger friends sometimes why it’s so important to marry a godly man.  But I’ll say it here. Character overshadows “swag” any day. Good looks and good style is definitely attractive but a man who loves Jesus first was what I was looking for. For instance, I wanted a man who loved to worship because that was something important to me that showed that He loved being with Jesus. 

1 Timothy 2:8 In every place of worship, I want men to pray with holy hands lifted up to God, free from anger and controversy.

As a matter of fact, my mentor Pastor Tami encouraged me to make a list of my 5 “non-negotiables” and she prayed that I wouldn’t settle for anything less. Here are the 5 I wrote down:

1. He is a worshipper of Jesus 

2. He loves the church and serves 

3. He is financially stable

4. He is kind and cares about the poor 

5. He loves his mom & treats her right 

BTW #5 is always a good indication of how he will treat you! 

2. The 2nd Reason I wanted to marry a godly man is so I could trust him to be loyal and faithful. 

I had seen the negative effects of how addiction, abuse, and unfaithfulness in marriages ended in divorce and I didn’t want that. I wanted to marry someone I believed carried a conviction to be faithful to me! 

Proverbs 5:15 (GNT) Be faithful to your own wife and give your love to her alone.

3. The third reason I wanted to marry a godly man, is because I wanted a man to be a present father for my kids.

I didn’t have my dad in my life growing up. And my stepdad, who tried his very best, struggled with a lot of pain and so I never quite felt fathered in a healthy way. I asked for a man who had a good relationship with his Heavenly Father, so he would be a good earthly father for our kids. 

‭‭Psalms‬ ‭103:13‬ ‭TPT‬‬ “The same way a loving father feels toward his children— that’s but a sample of your tender feelings toward us, your beloved children, who live in awe of you.”

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These were the main 3 reasons why I wanted to marry a godly man. And by the way...

I did end up meeting the godly man of my dreams at a used car dealership of all places! It was the day I was picking up the car I had recently purchased, and it was his first day of work! The manager knew I was a believer and told me before I left, “Hey I just hired a really good Christian guy named Gabe, you should go meet him”

I remember walking into his small office and saying “Hey, we have the same name.”

Over the next few minutes, we talked about worship, our passion for missions to help the poor & how we loved serving at our churches. 

Little did I know that day, I would be marrying that man of God nearly 5 years later! Little did I know that day, he is financially wise. That he had an amazing relationship with his mom. Little did I know then that he would be the most present and loving father to our kids! Little did I know that day, that God had prepared this man for me and he met all the desires of my heart and more! 

I’m so thankful I had made my list and married the right one!

What’re your reasons for why you wanted to marry a godly man?! And if you’re single, if you haven’t made your list of non-negotiables, I encourage you to do that today!

Love you boo,

Pastor Gaby