I love my husband very much. He is a great person but early in our marriage, we could make each other extremely angry because we couldn’t agree. We were so different and we both wanted our way.  Like on Friday nights, I enjoyed staying up late and sleeping in and he liked to go to bed early and wake up early Saturday morning. On our days off, I wanted to go have fun and he wanted to do chores. If we watched a TV program he would choose a cowboy movie and I wanted a romance movie. We were complete opposites. 

We were very attracted to each other and we both deeply loved God.  We knew God had put us together for His divine purposes. So we decided to work hard at caring for each other and keeping our love alive. Since we are Christians we relied on God’s Word and the Bible to direct our marriage. The Bible gives instructions for a lasting relationship. The scriptures promise that when we read our Bible and apply it to our lives we will prosper and be successful in everything we do. Joshua 1:8, Keep this Book of the Law always on your lips; meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do everything written in it. Then you will be prosperous and successful.

Jerry and I struggled because we wanted our own way and because we wanted the other person to meet our needs. But as we read God’s Word we realized love is about giving, being kind, and meeting each other’s needs. It’s about thinking of the other person more than you think about yourself. Phil 2:4-5 Abandon every display of selfishness. Possess a greater concern for what matters to others instead of your own interests. And consider the example that Jesus, the Anointed One, has set before us. Let his mindset become your motivation.

We have changed for each other in hundreds of ways; here are a few ways we have adjusted to meet each other’s needs: 

Him: Jerry loves eating 3 meals a day and I prefer just 1 large meal daily. I know how important food is to him, so I have learned to make breakfast, lunch, and dinner. He makes the coffee and helps with the dishes. 

Me: I love to give to others, so we have adjusted the budget so I have giveaway money. 

Him: Jerry wants to arrive five to ten minutes early to places. So I try to be ready to leave 15 minutes early to honor his desire to be punctual.

Me: I like my car looking new. Jerry cleans the inside of my car almost daily. And he keeps it full of gas and smelling new.

Him: Jerry craves intense boot camp exercise, hard mountain bike rides, and impossibly long strenuous hikes. I try my best to keep up with him and still look amazing. 

Me: I love celebrating all holidays, so Jerry always joins in the fun helping me shop, decorate and cook. He does it with a smile and lots of compliments. 

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Reading and obeying the Bible will bring success to any marriage.  Jerry and I have always tried to read our Bibles daily with a Bible reading plan that reads through the Bible systematically. Looking back, I know our marriage of 38 years would have not been successful, romantic, or loving without reading and applying the Bible.  Reading the Bible saved our marriage, it has made us best friends, hot intimate lovers and given us a dream marriage that will last for a lifetime.

How to Read the Bible

1. Follow a Plan - Read the New Testament with us! Find the reading plan on the website by clicking here: https://www.citychurchsd.com/bible-reading-plan-2021

2. Pick a Time - Maybe it’s right before bed or when you both first wake up. Do it in 10 minutes.

3. Think of a Place – Find a spot and make it comfortable. Grab a blanket, make some tea or hot chocolate. 

4. Make a Commitment - Try it for the rest of this year. 

5. Talk About It. As you’re reading take turns reading out loud. If you see a verse that stood out...maybe say a short prayer. 

Allow the Bible to change you.

We had to mature, submit and learn to follow the Bible. The Bible has taught us so much. Jerry had to learn not to be harsh with his words towards me, and I had to change and not be critical of him. We both felt we had to stop disagreeing all the time and stop being easily angry at each other. This was difficult for us because we thought so differently; I wanted him to think like me and he wanted me to think like him. As we read the Bible we realized we were to think like Jesus. 

The Bible taught us so much about marriage. Especially to be humble, giving, and change. We practice doing what is best for the other person. Yes, it is hard work to change and grow.  But it is God’s will and purpose in our marriage that we mature and become like him: the ultimate giver. The more we sacrifice and change the more our marriage becomes the dream come true. Jesus gave everything to us and he asks us to give, change and become like him in our marriage. 

Our primary source of change is in the Bible. To be changed by the Bible you have to respond to it and make the changes. Ask yourself these questions:

• When reading the Bible has it shown me a sin or a wrong attitude that I need to confess and change?

• When reading the Bible look for a command you should be following or obeying and make the change?

• When reading the Bible which verse is God speaking to me and how can it change me?

Let’s all make it our goal this year to be changed into a mature and giving person by the Bible. Share with us your plan to read the Bible.