A Gentleness Journey

I was THAT mom in the grocery store: publicly correcting my daughter with my words and snatching the phone out of her hands. Hailey had just knocked over the perfectly balanced display of cereal boxes in the store about 5 seconds after I had asked her to put the phone down. I was frustrated and instead of responding with patience and gentleness, I was harsh. Within 10 seconds my anger had subsided and I felt like a failure of a mom. Nothing was broken. No one was hurt. It was just cereal boxes. I took a deep breath and stopped pushing the grocery cart. I needed to apologize. Too many times lately I find myself apologizing to my daughter for my rash actions and harsh tone of voice. I feel challenged in the area of gentleness.In the grocery store situation, she didn’t get her phone back (because she disobeyed me so there was a consequence). At the same time, my daughter didn’t deserve to be embarrassed by her mom in front of strangers. I’m learning and growing. Philippians 4:5 says, “Let your gentleness be known to everyone.” Before I can get to the “everyone” I have to let gentleness work in my house toward my family. One step forward on the journey of gentleness.Some women are naturally gentle. Like my mother-in-law! Her name is Rachel (which means little lamb) and she is soft and kind and gentle with her words 99% of the time (because no one is perfect). I feel like I bark orders at my kids, shout to get their attention, demand grocery clerks to move faster, and when I’m moving too fast I can be forceful, harsh, and overly stern for no real reason. Stress did that to me! And I don’t like it. I want to change. I know there is a gentle way inside of me. If the FRUIT of the SPIRIT is gentleness then I need to be active in my life.Colossians 3:12 says, "Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience."Here is what I am learning. I have to break down how to be gentle and set a goal to do 3 gentle things each day.

My 3 Steps towards Gentleness (that everyone can try!):

  1. I can use Gentle words (defined as kind or tender)

  2. I can use my hands Gently to touch/act (defined as a verb that calm or pacify.)

  3. I can slow down to react/respond with Gentleness (defined as moderate in action, effect, or degree; not harsh or severe.) *definitions from Dictionary.com

I don’t think any of us women would say we want to be harsh. No one wants to be thought of as “severe.” Why do we pet dogs? To calm them down. Why do we rub babies backs when they are trying to fall asleep? Because we want to bring comfort. Why do we physically reach out to a friend that is sharing her pain? Because a gentle touch or word can pacify their tears. When we act with gentleness, the Holy Spirit is released in us.With the help of the Holy Spirit we can all be more Christ-like. If Jesus was gentle then I want to be gentle too.A few last thoughts as I close (these are my daily wake-up reminders):

  • I am on a journey of gentleness. (Which means I won’t be perfect at it right away.)

  • I can use a gentle tone of voice with my kids.

  • It is easy to speak gentle words to my husband.

  • I am going to be intentionally gentle when I am out in public.

  • I will grow in my gentleness the more I act gently.

I am working toward this gentle spirit so that I can be who God designed me to be. I am inviting you all to join me on a gentleness journey. Here’s to growing gently together!

Love and All the Best!

Julia Pearson

Our Fame Pastors have been walking us through the power of the fruits of the Spirit this Spring. This is the last post of our series, but if you'd like to start from the beginning here's the link to the first post if you’d like to catch-up. Plus we’d love to hear from you, believe with you, and pray with you – comment below. 

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